Shoulders of a Man Part 2

I mentioned in my last post that I had read a captivating collection of insight, truth, beauty and sorrow entitled "A Wife's Eyes are the Window to a Man's Soul" written by Randy Elrod. I'll come back to truth again, but want to touch on insight.

I'm reminded of a passage in Wild At Heart where author John Eldredge writes of his own interactions with women. He describes talking with a woman and internally asking: "what is God revealing about Eve? What is He revealing about himself?" There's such wisdom and power in those questions.

We all have that opportunity everyday, all the time. This kind of awareness is evident in Randy's observations about his associates wives over the years. Oh that we would all live so aware.

Human interaction is so much more than sight, touch and sound. It is about life. It empowers, feeds and fills us, if we will let it.

I hope you will. 

Shoulders of a Man

I read a captivating collection of insight, truth, beauty and sorrow yesterday entitled "A Wife's Eyes are the Window to a Man's Soul." It was written by Randy Elrod and I encourage you to read it here. Actually, implore would be a more accurate word - GO READ IT!

I suspect this will develop into a series, but I at least have to talk about the weight of Randy's observations and the fact that this weight is squarely on the shoulders of the man. Though the cliche "when momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy" might be amusing, it is wrong. The truth is that when daddy ain't a man, ain't nobody happy. And I've grown to accept and appreciate this fact as you'll see below.

The mantle of leadership in a marriage sits squarely on the shoulders of the man. It cannot be removed, it is not there by the choice of either individual and it is there whether the two parties involved recognize it or not.

Three thoughts:

1. I know I'm on the thin ice of "wives be in submission to your husband" and the associated abusive actions, teachings and destroyed families. But that just proves the point. The leadership in a marriage - good, bad or indifferent - decides it's fate. And the leadership is the man.
2. The weight of this mantle is crushing. It is of grave importance, difficult to do well, hard to define and under constant attack from both the world and the wife. It's supposed to be. As Randy states, this is about the measure of a man and no man can be a man without overcoming challenges and adversity (no woman either).
3. The mantle can be managed, and it can be managed well. How? Submission.
   

I've found that the only way to successful manage this mantle of authority is to submit to both the role itself and the One who bestowed it. This helps me shut out my gut reactions of wanting to run, hide, cower or control - and believe me, I want to do all of those ALL the time. Instead, I remind myself that if I'm in the role, I must therefore be "qualified." At the same time though, I am deeply aware that I'm not qualified at all and cannot succeed without the guidance and council of God in all matters.

It's a delicate balance because it's easy to get it wrong. I spend my life going back and forth between "I'm the MAN" and "here God, fix this!" It's ugly. And damaging. When I hit the right balance though, it's power-ful for those around me and myself.

The mantle of leadership in a marriage is bestowed upon the man for the purpose of blessing. it is meant to not only bless the wife, children and community (the world), it is meant to bless the man. Reread the final section of Randy's post with this in mind and imagine the man who's wife has "Fulfilled Eyes".

Do you think he's blessed? Blessed indeed.

Deceptive Distraction

A dear and powerfully insightful friend wrote a couple of posts on his blog this week and I've been a part of the ongoing conversation over there. Instead of commenting on his latest post, I'm writing here for more room. It all started as a result of a fascinating, but incriminating report by the Barna Group siting all How Teenagers' Faith Practices are Changing. I'm sure you can guess they're NOT changing for the better.

I commented: "Probably because I'm reading Dallas Willard's The Divine Conspiracy, but my answer to why is that we've been deceived into accepting the Gospel of "Sin Management" instead of heaven on earth and kingdom of God LIFE. So instead of living and therefore preaching the good news of power/passion/joy/purpose infused life, all we have is a list of don't dos. And that is no good news at all."

Then I read this today on Pete Wilson's blog: "We have a culture-war spirituality that produces Christians who might never share their faith but are ready at a moment’s notice to debate politics, abortion and civil union for gay couples. It is a spirituality that calls down fire on its enemies and shapes its followers into intolerant soldiers waging a morality crusade. Its
kingdom is the eventual triumph of moral conservatism, and its spirituality is conflict and argument."  - Michael Spencer

So at a time of an unprecedented flow of information and communication, we've been deceived into focusing on distracting half-truths in stead of life giving full truths. What would happen if:

• We showed people a life so empowered by faith that they became desperate
  to know how it's done.
• We told kids/teenagers so much about the wonders and joys of marriage that they wouldn't settle for anything less?
  
• And that the discussion included SEX ('cause it is, after all, part of the wonder and joy)!
• And that the primary reason for the joy and wonder of marriage is the challenge of it being between a man and woman. "Of COURSE it's difficult, how else are you going to grow into a powerful and purpose-fulfilling man or woman without it?"
• And btw, THAT'S the call of the gospel. To grow into a powerful and purpose-fulfilling man or woman. The forgiveness of sin is NOT the goal. Forgiveness of sin is the "must have" that God takes care of so you can ask him about the power and purpose.
• And to add to that, what if we painted the proper, glory-filled picture of life that they got completely enamored with the whole idea that they actually started WORKING for it?

Of course the bigger question I'm uncovering is how do we first live like this? And I'm asking because that's where the deceptive distraction has the tightest hold. Not only do we communicate the half-truths, we live them.

And that's tragic.

The Desires of Your Heart

I'm posting a link to this Untemplater video interview of Seth Godin on all my blogs today for two reasons. And since my first reason is the same for all three postings, it's at the bottom. My number 2 reason, specific to this blog appears first.

2.) This quote: "who can I change, what sort of example can I set. How can I build a platform for spreading ideas? ...to spread ideas and to make positive change." Inspiring stuff.

Despite all the bad news and very real struggles in the world today, I hope you'll grasp the core of the message of this video: there has never been a more opportunity filled time in the history of the world than today. There's never been a time so supportive of individuality and creativity. And Godliness.

"The glory of God is man fully alive" - St. Ireneaus

Now is the time to faithfully commit to explore the God breathed desires of your heart. To seek what it is God meant when he created YOU! And not just explore, but to then put hope, then faith, and then ACTION into and GO!

Because the unprecedented opportunities are not about you. They never are.

My wife and I attended a leadership conference this past weekend where we heard the following quote from Pastor John Guest: "This is a generation (all ages today) in DESPERATE need of inspirational leadership. A generation longing for authentic, passionate followers of Christ." Yes indeed.

We need you. Live fully alive!

1.) It's brilliant and I'm not exaggerating. If you are wondering what's going on the world today - financially, socially, etc., etc., - this interview covers most all of it thoroughly and insight-FULLY in ways you will not find anywhere else. Not only does Seth see the big pictures, but he puts them in dead-simple terms that will impact your life. At least I hope they will. Two quotes:
- "The future will not be like the past only shinier"
- The current economic template "was invented by people who owned factories"

I cannot oversell the importance of watching this video and paying attention to what's said.


Enjoy